A journalist's life isn't all glitz and glamour and for once in my career I've literally had to swallow my words - or at least try to.
There has been an incredible amount of hype, curiosity and discussion about the new Hungry Jack's Quad Stacker burger, and unfortunately it was my responsibility to find out if it was as nasty as they say.
First off, this massive burger is like nothing I've ever seen – this thing is a skyscraper of meat (it has over 4500 Kj (1,000 calories), 70g of fat and a LOT of sodium).
When I got to the Hungry Jack's counter and placed my order, I noticed another man next to me had done the exact same thing. Turns out all the bad publicity made him curious.
After arriving back at my desk, I had noticed that the plastic wrap around the burger had become somewhat moist - the oil from the burger leaked into the paper making it almost feel like a wet paper towel.
As I held the burger by both hands and prepared to take my first bite I could feel my cheek muscles straining to fit the beast of a burger into my mouth.
Even with all my efforts, I couldn’t fit it from top to bottom into a single bite so my eating technique was to take angular bites.
Slow and steady wins the race.
At first, I was happy with the taste of the burger as it had a great smoky flavour making it taste as if it came right off the barbie.
It had a few pieces of bacon, more then enough meat and an absurd amount of melted cheese.
As I continued taking bites I did notice that it seemed to be devoid of any crispness or freshness – the burger is uncontaminated by any vegetable matter.
The going got rough towards the end of the burger, but finally, I took my last bite with the aid of a big glass of water (how you would eat this burger with chips and a coke is beyond my comprehension) and I felt sweet victory.
The feeling didn't last long.
After 20 minutes of finishing the burger ... I'm perspiring ... my lips seem quite dry and I don't think I'm producing normal amounts of saliva in my mouth.
An hour later and six cups of peppermint tea later, I can't get rid of the greased feeling – there's a brick in my stomach.
I may have to head home.
Front page
RSS Feed